Fact: Our society is uncomfortable with death, dying and grief. You are a reminder of events and feelings that others are afraid of experiencing themselves. The fact is, expressing your grief outside yourself, giving it expression, is necessary if you want to move forward in your grief journey. Grief lasts as long as it lasts. It is different for everyone.

Fact: While there are commonalities in the bereavement process, each person grieves in their own way. Your grief and your bereavement journey will be unique to you because of the many variables involved.

Fact: The only way to “get through” grief is to grieve. Attempts to side-step or avoid one’s grief work only results in prolonging the process and setting oneself up for other problems like health, behavioral, spiritual and/or social issues. Your grief will find a way to express itself.

Fact: Grief is not something we “get over”, a term that suggests we and our life will go back to “normal”. A significant loss changes us forever. Dr. Alan Wolfelt, a man who has worked with people in mourning for many years, talks rather about “reconciliation”. Reconciliation, he says, is what occurs as the person works to integrate the new reality of moving forward in life without the physical presence of the person who has died.

Fact: Crying, as a part of mourning, generates a feeling of helplessness in those around us. Research actually suggests that suppressing tears may increase susceptibility to stress-related disorders. Tears are a part of how the body rids itself of “waste” just like sweating and exhaling. Tears relieve tension and stress.